So i told my mom the other day that i don't want to live and work in Singapore.
And do you know what she said?

"Can, only if we move to India."

Really? Of all places, she wants to live in India?!
But she was really skeptical about the whole idea of living aboard.
I don't know, when i was younger, i'd always dream of living abroad.
But now, i'm seriously considering it.
I'm 19, i'm allowed to make my own decisions right?

But...

Ciao. Come stai?
Io sono a scuola.
Sono le dieci di sera.
Mi piace molto Italiana.
Io voglio abitare in Italia.
Mi annoio!
Ciao!

"Theres no i in team 
no me in us 
no you in we"

 - Hellogoodbye

JailBird says:
*you are not appreciating your capability..
*whats important is, you should be grateful that with your hardwork, you deserve to stand where you are standing now..

I don't know about you but i think this asshole have become more wiser.

I'm afraid that if i get too over confident with myself, i will lose myself.
Afraid that i'd become a big headed, arrogant bitch.
That is why i'm always standing low.
But i'm tired of being too humble, people don't appreciate me.
Motherfuckers.
But it's okay, gonna keep on doing what i do best and fuck what people think of me.
I don't need your fucking opinion.

Excuse my French.
FarahFatin, you know what to do if i ever become a big headed, arrogant bitch.

It's amazing how yesterday i was at my highest high and today, i'm at my lowest low.
And it's all because of the people around me.
You made me broke down. Literally made me cry like i haven't in a million years.
All because of who i am.
I know i'm not perfect, i'm not pretty, i don't smile all the time, i'm fat, i'm worthless.
I know that. Can you people just let me be?
I was happy with who i am.
But now, i'm fighting myself.



"Never judge a book by it's cover"
"What matter most is the inside not the outside"
These are merely words people use carelessly.
I guess human beings are best at judging people.

On The Right Track

School's been fine. Nothing much to talk about really.
I'm starting to really get a hang of Italian.
I cannot keep my eyes off my Italian teacher.
But i can't help but to stare at him and go gaga.
So most of the time i keep my head down and my eyes on my book.
When i have to answer his questions, god, it's one of the most difficult multi-tasking thing to do;
To look at his face, and to think of an answer in Italian.
His smile... Oh my gosh!
Not cool. Not cool.
But learning Italian is fun.
Sad it's only for 4 weeks.

So i got news from Malcom today and apparently i got selected for some URA, urban design thingy.
Don't know how to react to it tho. Gonna give it a shot and try to gain some experience.
All of these for my future, i guess.
Seriously, i don't know where i am standing right now.
I never consider myself as one of the best students.
I still feel intimidated being around some of my course mates.
But for all i know, i'm giving a hundred percent of my efforts into everything that i do.

Sometimes, it got me thinking that i seriously can't see myself doing anything else but design.
And i know how difficult it is to be in the Design industry but that's what being in poly is all about; to prepare yourself for the real world.
And one thing i have to work on is to stop being afraid, grow and see things in different perspectives.
'Cause you'll never learn anything if you're always at your comfort zone and enclosing yourself to the same bunch of people all the time.
So for year 2, gonna try my best improving my grades and gain as much experience as possible.

This is my brain that's blogging by the way.

School is slack-y.
I don't like it.
One module; Italian.
6pm-9pm everyday.
I haven't been complaining much.
I enjoy Italian class, but not easy.
Then again, nothing in life is easy.
I miss having a lot of assignments.
I miss stressing over projects.
Now, all i have is homework.
Italian class makes me feel like i'm in secondary school all over again.
I miss complaining.
I've been quiet.
I miss design.