On The Right Track

School's been fine. Nothing much to talk about really.
I'm starting to really get a hang of Italian.
I cannot keep my eyes off my Italian teacher.
But i can't help but to stare at him and go gaga.
So most of the time i keep my head down and my eyes on my book.
When i have to answer his questions, god, it's one of the most difficult multi-tasking thing to do;
To look at his face, and to think of an answer in Italian.
His smile... Oh my gosh!
Not cool. Not cool.
But learning Italian is fun.
Sad it's only for 4 weeks.

So i got news from Malcom today and apparently i got selected for some URA, urban design thingy.
Don't know how to react to it tho. Gonna give it a shot and try to gain some experience.
All of these for my future, i guess.
Seriously, i don't know where i am standing right now.
I never consider myself as one of the best students.
I still feel intimidated being around some of my course mates.
But for all i know, i'm giving a hundred percent of my efforts into everything that i do.

Sometimes, it got me thinking that i seriously can't see myself doing anything else but design.
And i know how difficult it is to be in the Design industry but that's what being in poly is all about; to prepare yourself for the real world.
And one thing i have to work on is to stop being afraid, grow and see things in different perspectives.
'Cause you'll never learn anything if you're always at your comfort zone and enclosing yourself to the same bunch of people all the time.
So for year 2, gonna try my best improving my grades and gain as much experience as possible.

This is my brain that's blogging by the way.

School is slack-y.
I don't like it.
One module; Italian.
6pm-9pm everyday.
I haven't been complaining much.
I enjoy Italian class, but not easy.
Then again, nothing in life is easy.
I miss having a lot of assignments.
I miss stressing over projects.
Now, all i have is homework.
Italian class makes me feel like i'm in secondary school all over again.
I miss complaining.
I've been quiet.
I miss design.

I think i have come to a stage in life that my taste in music have mature, tremendously. Been opening up myself to  different genres like psychedelic, funkadelic, electronica, alternative, etc. Definitely love british bands. 'Cause let's face it, i can't stand all the pop songs they've been feeding to youngsters these days.

I remember when i was younger, all i listen to is "noise". Yeah, because i thought i was some hardcore kid. I guess that's just part and parcel of life, you learn from your past/mistakes. And until you reach a certain point in life and reflect, you start to see all the things you wished you hadn't done.

Even with the way i am living life right now. In the next few years' to come, i'd probably be saying what a dick i've been. But that's all in the future. Right now, i'm content with my life and the way i'm living it, and that is what matters the most. I don't need everything to be perfect.

Wow, just by the thought of that makes me feel so old. Can't be forever young, no?

'Bout time I set this record straight
All the needle nose punching is making me irate
Sick of my bitching falling on deaf ears
Where you gonna be in the next five years?

Why do I listen to these kind of songs/music? Even I ask myself why, sometimes. But, meh... I guess it's just who I am, really. No matter how hard I try to change that little part of me, I can't seem to let go. When i listen to certain songs/genres, i get this feeling taking over me. It's that feeling that makes you bob your head or move along with the song. You know? It's one of those unexplainable feelings you get. Sometimes the music i listen to can affect my mood for the day. And metal is one of them.

I never was.
Don't know if i ever will be.

Why?

Why do we hate?
Why do you have the need to impress people?
Why do you have to need to change?
Why do our race and religion defines who we are?
Why do we judge?
Why are we so obsessed?
Why do you have to the need to become popular?
Why do you need so many friends?
Why are you afraid of living your life alone?
Why do you have the need to follow trends?
Why do you have to wear designer clothes?
Why are you so conscience of how you look?
Why are you so sure that love only refers to your significant other?
Why do you have the need to get attention?
What is attention? What will you benefit from it?
Why do you need all the material things in life?
What is your point in life?

Now ask yourself these questions.
I have come to a point where i'm sick and tired of how people see the world. From now on, i'm just gonna live my own way and keep my opinions to myself because the truth is, the word "Trust" have been senselessly used until it has lost it's meaning. And i bet about 90% of the questions i asked is true. Yeah, you might say no but the truth is, you're just too stubborn to admit it. People now have forgotten who they are and where they came from. They depend too much on the media and trying so hard to fit in with the society.