Last Shadow Puppets

The Chamber (acoustic)

Meeting Place (Acoustic)
(Alex Turner is freaking adorable!)
Been listening to these guys lately.
Awesome duo. I couldn't get enough of them.
Definitely one of the best band i've ever heard in ages.
Apart from Avenged Sevenfold.

Alhamdulillah.

I SWEAR TO GOD, i wasn't expecting a 5.

Now, that i've proved myself that i'm not like my father,
And made my mother happy,
I have to study hard and do well for O's.
And prove to my father that i'm better off without him.
Prove to him that i am better than him.
And make my mother fucking proud.
I will not give up until i pay up all the sacrifices
my mother have made for me.
And i will keep my word until the day i die.

ps. i have never forgiven you for all the things you have said and done to her. And i never will. Now look where she has got me. Where were you when i needed you? You don't even bother to make a phone call to ask how we were. I don't even know if you still care for us. 'You're just a name without a face' to me now. I don't need you anymore, dad.

Peter Petrelli.

I was watching Heroes last night and my brother happens to be online. I missed two episodes on TV so i downloaded it. In fact, i downloaded every episode. I got so pissed off when Peter lost his powers to his father. And the first thing i did was complain to my brother. Whoa, he still can entertain me lor...

Milo Ventimiglia (Peter Petrelli)
HOT!
Even my brother claim he looks the same as Milo.
Tak tahu malu!

My Love.

I'd happily die just drooling over him.
I don't fucking need a boyfriend as long as i have him to drool over.
Get that straight to your head, fucktard.

Envier.

I want to post something.
But i have no idea what to post.








... Still envious of my brother.
Damn it!

SpongeBob SquarePants!

All questions have answers.
No matter how ridiculous the question is, there sure is bound to be an answer.
But there's just this one question i haven't got any answers to it.

WHY? Why would a sponge live in a pineapple under the sea?!WHY?!
This is driving me nuts!
Every single day, i kept thinking about that question.
I'd crack my head to figure out why.
Still, no answers.
GAH!!!!!

Amorous.

Howdy! It's been awhile since i posted something seemly. I shall take this time to update but i'm not promising a really long update. Let's just see.

I recently attended an Indian wedding dinner with my mom, aunties and cousins. It was last Thursday. It was fun. It was definitely something different. I've only been to Malay weddings, so i was quite anxious about it. Well, you know, me and crowds haven't been on good terms for quite sometime now. It was held at this Indian restaurant. Turns out, it wasn't that bad after all. Getting back home was a killer. It's never easy getting a taxi at Serangoon. It took us close to an hour to get a taxi. Jeez!

I went to this event held at Esplanade on Saturday, Beats and Breaks. Went to support my brother and also local artiste. It was an awesome show. How ironic to hear that from me. Especially from me, who have never been much of an hiphop fan. But i'll have to say, it was a great show. I found myself bobbing my head to the music. I definitely have more respect now for what my brother does. Yes, i used to criticise him and he always take it as a joke.







No, i did not take these pictures. Some guy with a fancy camera took it. A photographer lah. I freaking envy my brother loh. Someday, i'm gonna be on stage with a band. Just wait and see. :)

Faizal.

Thank you, Muhammad Faizal, for text messaging me at 3.21 AM.
Now i can't go back to bed.
If you haven't been there for me when i needed somebody, i would've already call and swear and curse you at that instant.
Grr...

Appreciate, please?

Appreciate your parents lah, motherfuckers.
And stop whining about how annoying, embarrassing or too overprotective your parents could be.
I am so sick and tired of people coming to me and saying that they hate their mother/father because of this and that.
At least you still have both of them.
So consider yourself lucky, bastards.

Doppelganger.

"So what if you can see the darkest side of me?
No one will ever change this animal I have become
Help me believe it's not the real me
Somebody help me tame this animal"
Animal I Have Become - Three Days Grace

I'm changing again. I'm back to the way i used to be. I'm changing to a person who i don't want to be. A person that i never want to be but there's no way of escaping it. Like, it's taking over me. I never want this. I thought i have change, but she kept on coming back to me.
It's like, i was curse to have her in me all my life.

I thought i have left that other side of me ages ago. I never thought she would come back and take over my life again. I remembered how i use to be. I was never happy. I never smile. I was cold, numb. I was always depress. I always kept things to myself. I was a pessimist. I never really talk to people. I was a social outcast. I was suicidal. I used to cut my myself. I had Synyster Gates' name scrawled across my arm, for fuck's sake! I was gullible. I did things without thinking about it first.

But then i came to my senses. I had to change. I had to grow up. And i did change. I was happy. I was smiling again. I learned to appreciate things. I could feel. I had emotions. But i was still unsociable - i figured that it was something i'm stuck with. But still, i was OK. I was whole. I was somebody else. Someone different. Someone the opposite of me.

But then something happened, and she came back knocking on my doors. Little did i knew, she was conquering me again. I had no choice but to her let take over me. Because i'm coward enough to face reality. Coward enough to be in the situation i'm in right now.


This could be the last of.... me.

.e.n.d.

Anguished.

FUCK!
Every single time when i look at myself in the mirror, i feel like stabbing a knife through my throat.
I feel like i don't deserve to be alive any more.
I feel like slashing every appendage on my body.
I fucking feel like shoving my hand in my mouth and pull out every single organ in my body.
I hate seeing my mother like this.
I fucking wish i could make things right again.
And i know that ought to be my death.
Fuck this life!

Dear God,

i wish i was dead.
I don't wish to make my mother suffer because of me.
And also the people around me.
And that my death would be the end of their suffering.



.d.e.a.d.

Noah.

"And if the sun comes up will it tear the skin right off our bones
And then as razor sharp white teeth rip out our necks I saw you there
Someone get me to the doctor, someone get me to a church
Where they can pump this venom gaping hole
And you must keep your soul like a secret in your throat
And if they come and get me
What if you put the spike in my heart"
- Vampires Will Never Hurt You - My Chemical Romance

-----------------------------------------------------------------------
This part is pure CRAP. Read if only you're interested.
I've warn ya! So don't fucking complain!
-----------------------------------------------------------------------

Today wasn't like any other day for me. I woke up this morning and found myself staring infront of the computer reading an article about Noah. Yeah, that patriarch from the Bible who built a ship(Noah's Ark) in which he, his family, and animals of every species survived the Flood. Last night, i saw this movie, Evan Almighty, right than and there i wanted to find out more about Noah. And it's interesting how his story was told. As much as i'd like to share the story, i'm afraid that would only bore you people. Go read about him at Wikipedia, he's one interesting man. God, i sound so geeky.

After reading about Noah(Nabi Nuh), i read about his sons, Cain and Abel, whose story i have already read. At that time i didn't knew who their father was. Founding out that Noah was thier father, i understand their story much more better. It's so cool that Noah died at the age of 950. After reading about Noah and his sons, i moved on to Adam and Eve, Moses, Muhammad, Gabriel, Satan, Satanism and i also read a little bit about Christianity and Judaism, which are a lot like Islam.

I don't want to talk about religion that much 'cause that might trigger a problem. Especially if i got anything wrong, that would only upset people. Besides, i don't think i know about them that much either. So you know, it's quite interesting reading about these things. I've always like reading about these kind of things.

I read too much! Gah!

-------------------------
Moving On...
-------------------------

I am suddenly going ballistic about the N level result. Lisa and i have been talking a lot about it lately and it's so frightening just thinking about it. I can't picture how i am going to react to my results. Whether if i have passed or failed. Whether if i'm going to seconday 5 or ITE. It's just too blood curdling. Sometimes i even shudder just thinking about it.

I seriously don't know how i will react to my results. I have no idea how my future's gonna be like. Ah, this is fucking killing me inside! I hate it when it comes to this kind of situation.


.e.n.d.

I ♥ MJ

He converted to Islam. This ought to be interesting.

Agoraphobic

I think i'm suffering from agoraphobia.


...


This is not good.

Envious.

"You gotta shady reputation
From bed to bed to man to man
Once you deliver your temptation
No one can stop your master plan
Don’t try to lie about it
I don’t believe a thing you say
The more you try to hide it
The more the lies show on your face "
- Dangerous Kind - The Rasmus


Well, yesterday was an unfruitful day for me. Spent the whole morning cleaning the whole house and by 12 i was done. And i still had 12 hours in my hands before turning myself in. So i decided to watch all of the Avenged's DVDs i bought - All Excess, Live In LBC and Making the Album. There was nothing good to watch on the TV and none of the movies on HBO were related to my likings. They show a lot of old movies. I don't mind watching old movies, but some of them are... inadequate? Some are really slow and some are just plain boring. But i like one movie in particular, Wayne's World. Damn hilarious. I'd recommend you people to watch it.

I'm fucking bored just staying at home all the time. If only my mother would allow me to have a job. Atleast that way, i wouldn't be wasting my time. With my brother married and Lisa in Australia, i have nobody to talk to. My younger brother is a whole other story. With two of my closest people gone, I think i'll go insane.

Me and my younger brother, we don't relate to each other very well. He's always out and when he's home, he'll be in fornt of the TV playing game or watching soccer, wrestling and some other uneducational programmes. Sometimes because of him, i'd miss watching my programmes. Fucking fustrating! The TV in the living room is only for my mother whenever she's at home. Yes, only she watches the TV in the living room whenever she's around. That's the rule. So by the time my programme starts, she'd already got home from work. So i had to constantly fight with my brother over the TV. And i hate it whenever he won.

Apart from that, i've been making love with my guitar and drawing and also reading. Here are the drawings. Enjoy. :)



I did this for my N-level art exam. But got disapproved because of "no originality". Bummer.

I'm fucking proud of this one. :D

Synyster Gates. :)

Johnny Christ.

The Reverend Tholomew Plague. I love this one.

M. Shadows

Zacky Vengeance. Not satisfied with this one.

Lauri Ylönen. The lead singer from The Rasmus.

Amy Lee. I'm not very happy about this one. Her eyes makes it look all wrong.
Whatever it is, i'm keeping this one.


My mother. When she was younger. Another of my favourites.

My brother and sister-in-law. Not really done yet.
Can't see the shading that well, 'cause my brother didn't want it to be too dark.


.e.n.d.

Obama! Obama!

"And as a race we look back and we’ve come so far.
While some may conquer, the others had it so hard.
But instead we just complain while there’s no one for us to fight.
I guess we’re bored and that's how we keep us occupied"
- The Fight - Avenged Sevenfold

Howdy! I have no idea why my elder brother is getting all excited on Obama being the new president. And he even kept on chanting,"Obama! Obama!" It's fucking hilarious just watching him. I can only give him the 'big-deal' face. And surprisingly, it is a big deal to him. How ironic!

Soon after, he explained to me why i should be excited. He said that the president of America is the most powerful person in the world. And that, we are all affected by it. Our life will change. Everything won't be the same anymore. And then he continued on chanting, "Obama! Obama!". He was so zealous when he spoke. I could only shook my head and laughed at him. So hilarious.

And in just 4 days he's getting married. Time seemed like a blur to me. The house's gonna be so quite without him around. No more loud music in the middle of the night. No more hip hopping around the house,actually, that's one good thing though. But i'm really gonna miss his nonsensical jokes. Though, he should thank me for getting so obsess over Heroes.

Yes, we are obsessed over Heroes. Just last sunday Star World had this Heroes season 2 marathon because season 3 will begin tomorrow, 6 November. I decided to watch it all over again because the last time i watched, i missed the last few episodes. And while i was watching, he decided to join and got hooked. We were glued infornt of the TV almost the whole day. And at one point i wanted to take a shower but i can't. So i waited for the advertisement. And i was literally rushing the whole way through. I was running around the house, my mother thought i was crazy. I didn't even dried my hair properly before putting on my clothes. And when i got out of the toilet my back was all wet. It was crazy.

We didn't eat, drink or pee. Until at one point of time, my brother had no choice but to buy food because we haven't eaten. He was so pissed off at it that he download the whole of season 2 and 1. It's great having someone so obsess with the same thing as you. And he would often scream and squirm on how he can't wait for Thursday in his sissy voice. Like how i scream and squirm about the Avenged Sevenfold gig. Yeah, just like that. Imagine how gay it'd sound. He's one hell of a brother.

____________________________________
Sherry said: why BATMAN?!
BATMAN said: why that fag face?
Sherry said: fair enough.

I had Syn's face as my display picture when he said that. I don't how why Shanzee hate Synyster Gates that much that he called him a fag face. What the hell, ZEE?!

.e.n.d.

Posting...

Will post something real soon!

Baby Teddy.

Howdy! Since i'm still wide awake and Fadzlon feels like burning my blog 'cause i haven't been updating, i shall update my blog today.

Today was alright. We had this class gathering thingy going on. To tell you the truth, it wasn't that 'happening'. But i had fun talking and gossiping with Fadzlon, Mira, John and Khalil. Before going for the pit, me and Mira went to City Hall to search for the Avenged Sevenfold DVD. After spending some time at HMV, i've gotten what i wanted. We then decided to walk around because it was too early to go for the pit.

It happens that i haven't even drank or eaten anything since morning, so i was craving to have something to drink. So we went to Starbucks. After walking around and around, 'cause we weren't suppose to have any food or drinks in the train, we manage to finish our drink. Then we headed off to the pit. By the time we reached there, it was already 7. So at that point of time, i've only had one glass of white chocolate mocha frappuccino(however you spell it) with whipped cream.

And i'm telling you this because i'm freaking pissed off with Baby Teddy. I fucking hate that bastard. He was this boy whom i have no idea who he was. And Fadzlon came up with the name Baby Teddy. Fucking hilarious lor! Woah, he eats like a _________. I don't even have a word to describe how he was like. Yes it was that bad. He eats a lot. I don't mind that. And i don't want to be rude but, from where i've grown up, i am taught that whenever we eat, we should also think about the other people. I'm sure your parents have also taught you that.

I only got to eat one hotdog. Why? Because Baby Teddy kept eating the food. I don't mind if he eats, but atleast have the initiative to help us cook lah. Only know to eat only! He can still sit far away from us. Scared if people ask for his food! Perangai orang gemok sia!

Wah pissed off sia with that boy. Then i gave up helping Fadzlon cooking, 'cause i know that Baby Teddy guy would finish it all. I decided to join Mira at the water breaker. That was when i find it so depressing to be in that place. Siting there in silence, it made me feel so depress. Yes, it was nice and peaceful. But there's something depressing about it. So i decided to head back to the tents and joined Fadzlon, John and Khalil.

Talked about some random stuff that came out of nowhere and gossiping about Baby Teddy. Then Mira joined us. Aftter we talk and talk and talk, we, except for khalil, decided to head back home. As soon as i reached home, straight away took a shower and thank god there was food. It seemed like i was globbling down the food without even chewing. Ok, i might have exaggerate little bit too much there. But I was gobbling down the food that my mother told me to slow down. I then told her that i only had one hotdog and one white chocolate mocha frappuccino all because of that Baby Teddy. Grr, screw that kid! But after a few spoonful of 'nasi goreng'(fried rice) my stomach got upset. 'Cause, my perot masuk angin. Woah damn pissed off with that Baby Teddy guy siak.

See lah, all because of that Baby Teddy guy, my English is so broken. Pissed off, really pissed off. I think he has a wall for a face. Ah, talking about this Baby Teddy guy made me lost my mood!

.e.n.d.

Bio.

Somehow,
i find this picture
rather amusing.

p.s i will try to update soon. if i want to.

24/10/2008

EEEEKK!!!
I can't believe today has
finally come!

FUCKSTER.

"How can I decide what's right?
When you're clouding up my mind
Can't win your losing fight all the time
Not gonna ever own what's mine
When you're always taking sides
You wont take away my pride
No not this time
Not this time"
- Decode - Paramore

Finally, I got rid of the unnecessary load off my shoulders! I finally deleted my friendster account, multiply and those stupid, annoying birthday reminder website thingy. I wonder why people still use that? I got tired of opening my email and see a whole stretch of emails from fuckster and multiply. I'm just glad to get rid of them all.

I just got tired of friendster. Some people there are crazy. I can't believe some are even competing about how many friends or comments they have. Like they said, the more friends or comments you have, the more supreme you'll be. Well, that's just bullshit. Oh yes, i am so against friendster right now. Some people there are fake and i'm just sick of it.

And it fucking annoys me when a person returning a comment saying,"You view my profile but never give comment ar?" What the fuck?! Don't have face is it? Wah, these kind of people are really unbelievable. They must be so free to be giving every person a comment about viewing his/her profile and not giving any comments. UN-BE-LIV-ABLE! Seriously, i can hysterically laugh at these kind of people. Tsk tsk tsk.

Terasa? Bagus pon kau sedah sendiri.

Actually, there's still alot more things that i wanted to say but i'm just too lazy to type it all down. And if you think you falls under the group of people that i've mention above, i suggest you go fuck yourself and go get a life.

.e.n.d.

Twilight.

I'M IN LOVE!

I'm madly in love with the book i'm reading. I can't seem to be able to part from it. Everywhere i go, it will always be in my hand. And today is only the second day since i started reading it. And i'm 3/4 done. If i were to continue reading it right now, i think i'd finish it by midnight.

Never in my life i'd be so engross with a book. It's not like any other books i've read. This one is totally different. I don't want to specifically state its difference in my blog because i know it will only bore you readers.

I can't seem to take my mind off from it. You know when you read a book, you'd always picture it in your head? Whatever i do, be it watching TV, doing the laundry and even now as i am typing down this post, the picture is still in my head. And that only made me more obsessive about the book. And everytime when i'm reading it, i can't seem to stop. And when i wanted to stop, i'd always finish the chapter i'm reading. And when i turn to the next chapter to stick my bookmark in between the pages, i'd always accidently took a glance of the first few lines of the chapter. And that only made me to continue reading.

But eventually i had to stop. I still have to remember that i have a life to live. Everytime i when i read, i am dying to what will happen next but at same time, i don't it to end that fast. I only have been reading it for 2 days and i'm almost done. And as you know me, i hate waiting. So die die must buy the sequel before finishing this one.

I know that this book have been out there for awhile and i know i am so outdated, but who cares? I know some of you people have read it. So please keep your month shut and don't spoil it! Thank you very nice.

And one more thing. I cannot stop laughing while reading this post from Farah's blog. Sweet Memories! Click here to read it. Read hor!


.e.n.d.

Charism.

"Everything is paid for tonight
While at the party of the
Dead dancing in their graves
The drinks here are free
So relax
Enjoy the sight of all the
Dead dancing in their graves
And while the world that they built
Told 'em to change
Told 'em to listen
They just kept it the same"
- Dancing Dead - Avenged Sevenfold

I have learned something today. I have learnt that i should be more confident and open my damn mouth and start talking to people more often. I can't just depend on other people to do that for me. I seriously need to change that part of me. I hate when people think i'm arrogant but really, i'm not- atleast that's what my friends told me. I seriously need to change my attitude. Well, my shyness that is.

OK! I'm in a relatively good mood today.Went to Orchard with Lisa to find my long awaited Avenged Sevenfold dvd/cd. But to no avail. I asked the person at the counter and he said it is still not in stores yet. Was quite disappointed at first, but the 'metal section' really make me want to buy all the cds on the shelf. After minutes of browsing up and down the self, i brought the lastest Metallica cd, Death Magnetic. Was quite happy with it. Metallica oi! Don't play play hor!

Then we walk, walk, walk from The Heeran to Plaza Singapura. To tell you the truth, in the past, almost, 16 years of my life, i have never been to Plaza Singapura. Shocking but true. I really do live under a shell. Went to search for this book called, Twilight at Times bookstore. I only found out about it like two days ago when most of my chinese classmates have been reading it all this while. Wah, i seriously live under a shell. I read a little bit about the book on the internet and i immediately wanted to buy the book. So, i finally got what i was looking for. Wah, damn happy sia!
Muke puki!
Then while we were browsing through the magazine section, i suddenly wanted to get a job at Times. And Lisa was like, "WHY?!". So i explain to her that by working at Times, i can get access to books? It was a stupid explaination, but she did buy it. And we decided to get a job at Times. But not right now though. Really excited about that. After all that huha at Times, we decided to eat. It took us some time to decide whether to eat KFC or McDonalds. I wanted KFC because i've been craving for Zinger ever since the fasting month. But Lisa on the other hand, wanted McDonalds. After comparing the two restaurant, we decided on McDonalds. But thank god! It was full. So KFC loh.


Then blablablah, we decided to walk and walk to Suntec City then to the Esplanade then to Clake Quay? Not exactly Clake Quay ar, just until the huge white bridge. I seriously have no idea where i was at that moment. To busy looking at ang mohs to care where i was. Then we have a seat in between the huge white bridge and the Museum of Singapore Civilisation? I'm definate that it's a museum and it has something to do with Civilisation.

Then after a while, we decided to head back home. I was tired and totally satisfied. I have been locking myself at home for far too long. And i'm really glad to see what really is happening in the society and learning something new. What the fuck?! Seriously, i have no idea what i'm talking about.

Anyway, i think Lisa find me boring.
I don't know. I think i read too much.
I think there's something funny about my nose.
Ok, this is totally random.
I need to get back to that book!

24 OCTOBER!!!!

.toodles.

I'm Going Back To Black.

Hello, people who don't have a life and waste thier time reading my nonchalant blog! This morning, i was awaken by a wierd and a scary dream. I had a dream about my N levels. That is the wierd part. The scary part is that, i only got 7 points. 7 points! Damn that scares the shit out of me. Just when i thought the N Levels are over, it is still haunting me in my dreams.

Right now, I'm waiting for 24 October to come. I seriously can't fucking wait! That ticket have been kept for too long now. It just can't wait to be torn by the usher by the door. FUCK I CAN'T WAIT! Who isn't?! We're talking about fucking Avenged Sevenfold. Ah yes, you must be,"Here she goes again". Who cares?! This my blog. So shut the fuck up and read or just leave. I'm in a bad mood right now, so the only thing that makes me happy is Avenged Sevenfold. I don't fucking care what you think of me.

Today is quite hectic and quite exhausting. Quite alot of people came to my house today. As usual, i hate it. So i sat in my room. But my mom kept asking me to sit outside and layan the people. Which i am not good at. So i just kept myself in my room and my mom is pissed. Then Lisa arrived. Wah, finally got somebody to talk to. That was what i thought. But then, after arguing about how 'action' Synyster Gates is and how kental i was last time, she has to go. Wah, heart sank i tell you. Actually no ar. Exaggerating only. But luckily, not long after, everybody decide to go. Wah, it's like, they know i want them out of my house. Rude. I know. Who cares?! Fuck them all!

I'm cranky right now. So fuck what i am saying right now. I just need to talk to Shanzee and i don't fucking know where he is. I fucking need that kid right now.


.fuck.you.all.fuck.the.world.

Geylang, sipaku Geylang.

Well hello dick heads! It's been some time since i have updated properly, so here i am. I'm just lucky to be breathing still. I never thought i would survive today.

Today, my mother dragged me to geylang. Actually yesterday ar because 2 o'clock in the morning already. But whatever. I was suppose to be studying for my exams on Monday but, my mother literally dragged me to geylang today. And man, i HATE it. If you know me well enough, you would already know that i hate crowds. I hate crowded places. I HATE places with ALOT of people. Yes, let me repeat it again, I HATE CROWDS.

I was freaking out in the taxi when i saw how crowded Geylang was. But too bad, there was no way of turning back. Being in a subconscious state, i manage to survive the day. My mom brought a few clothes for my brother first because his was cheap and easy to choose from. He is not the picky type of person, where else i was. Mom brought him like 4 pieces of clothes. Genuinely speaking, i wasn't jealous. I couldn't care less of owning a 'Baju Kurong'(traditional costume). Being a fussy person as i am, i took some time to find my baju kurong. And everytime i came across the one that i wanted, i would ask how much it cost. And if it exceeds $40 i wouldn't buy it. Then i came across this Kebaya(yet another traditional costume) and i really like it. And it cost $56++. I said no to it. My mom was pissed alright. She said it was an OK price. OK price?! I almost got into an agrument with my mom about buying something expensive that i'll probably gonna wear it once or twice.

Then, my mom brought me to this shop and ask me to try on this particular baju kurong. I was quite pleased with it but i had an issue of choosing the colour of the baju kurong. My cousin told me to get the white one, while my mother told me to get the blue one. But i sticked to one colour, black. Then as usual, i asked my mother the cost of the baju kurong. But she tired changing the subject and told me to wait outside. When she already paid for it, i asked how much it was and i was damn shocked when she said $90. $90 leh! Wah, i seriously felt guilty buying that baju kurong. But my mom kept saying it's ok. OK?! $90 is not NOT ok, ok!

Imagine how many things i can spent with that $90. Walau! i wish i could return the baju kurong and get the money back. Still, my mother insist on buying another baju kurong. After that $90 baju kurong, how could i want to buy another one?! I kept refusing everytime she tried to make me buy another one. So what if i only have one baju kurong, i don't care. I'm not a huge fan of baju kurong. Wah, i seriously feel bad buying that damn expensive baju kurong.

Ok, enough about the baju kurong and back to the part of me hating huge crowds. As we all know, Geylang will forever be packed with people. And when it comes to these kind of situation, people may get selfish and fucking rude. And i can't tolerate people who are rude. It really pisses me off when people accidentally pushed me without saying sorry and continued walking with thier nose up high. Wah, damn arrogant! Some even gave the 'what the fuck,bitch?!' look. Tsk tsk tsk. The nerves of some people.

When it got worse and people just wont give way, i literally started to push them. I'm too tired to elaborate on that. Overall, i'm just glad i manage to survive today. And i would rather kill myself if i were to go to Geylang again. Yes, i hate Geylang THAT much.

__________________________________________

Oh great, i lost another of my favourite guitar pick.
DAMN! I have no idea how many times i have lost my picks.
And i still hate myself for losing my lucky 13 guitar pick my brother brought me.
Best guitar pick EVER.

Right...
I'm gonna turn myself in now.
Got alot to study tomorrow.
DAMN IT!

.e.n.d.

I Miss You.

"Hey dad
I'm writing to you
not to tell you, that I still hate you
just to ask you
how you feel
and how we fell apart
how this fell apart"
- Emotionless - Good Charlotte

I'm starting to feel the feeling when you missed someone you hate.
Do you get me?

.e.n.d.

GRADUATED!

18th of September, which is today, marked the day that i realised that it is the start of a new beginning. And yes, we graduated today. 4 years ago, i thought getting to sec 4 would be like forever. But now i've realise that time really flies. It felt as if it was only a year ago that i got into Springfield Secondary School. And it's very hard for me to part away from the people that i'm really comfortable with.

After a long, tiring, dramatic day at school, we finally had to register our names and proceeded to the school hall for our graduation ceremony. It was a long and dragy one but it was overall fun. Because i was sitting next to Hafiz and Naddy, so we got to talk with each other and make fun of other people. And then, at this point of the time, Naddy just had to mention to me that that the guy who was giving his speech on the stage had his hair like a 'tikus mondok'. I'm not sure what that is in English but it surely reminded me of a joke we used to laugh to about a year ago.

And when the ceremony ended, wah, people got all teary. I didn't want to cry. But after hugging Farah, it made me realised that this is almost the end of our secondary school life. And everytime when i hugged somebody, my words got choked and i didn't get to say what i wanted to them. I cried so hard when it comes to Sheila. She seriously made me so emotional when her words started coming out of her mouth. That girl ar really made me cry so hard that i didn't get to take picture with the whole class. And it was also saddening when i hugged Hafiz. Although we have been friends since primary 1, he still want to see me in sec 5. Wah, we even made a promise to go sec 5 together gether. It really sank my heart to let go of these people.

About the future, i don't know how it will turn out to be. But one thing's for sure is that i am not ready. I'm not yet ready for the whole world. I am still not ready of 'letting go of my mother's hand'. I'm not ready to roam the world freely. I feel as if i still need to hold my mother's hand when crossing the road. Well, i'm sure you get what i mean by that.

Now, i need to get back to my art.
Wah, just when i'm thought i got rid of art.
It came back chasing me.


.e.n.d.

Exhilarated.

There is no word in this world can describe how i'm feeling right now.
And all thanks to Asy'Ari

Unholy Confession.

This one just made me want it more & more.



“This is the first time I’ve ever really got to see A7X
in action as our fans, family and friends get to. It was
honestly a magical night to headline the arena that I
saw my first ever concert at 18 years prior. Seeing the
girls dance to ‘Scream’ on the DVD was a particular
treat, as my back was towards them while I was playing.
I’ve been in the band since day one and, watching this, I
realized that I am also one of the biggest fans of my
friends and bandmates onstage beside me. I hope you
all enjoy it as I have. O doyle rulz.” - Zacky V.

Possibilities.

"I need the product of your fears
In the form of tears
It's the only way I can survive
It breaks my heart to see you crying, baby
It's the only way I'll stay alive
Green eyes, blue skies
Natural disasters when she cries
Green eyes, they're mine
It's only a matter of time."
- Time - Cute Is What We Aim For

HELLO!

Screw the previous post. I am in a relatively good mood today. School was fun today. Although i was abit moody in the morning, i was psyched by the third period. Art was a bore. I literaly talked to Mira for the whole two periods. I seriously can't think of any idea for my Art. I thought of doing Mutant but i suck at drawing and painting humans. Don't know ley. I just hope i could think of something come Tuesday.

So, as you all know, we already did our English, Malay and Social Studies papers. That means we have alot of free periods and these free periods are for us to self-study. For the past few days, we have been doing Maths non stop. I'm not sure what the others did, but the people around me was so into Maths. But today, we were like talking all the way. Serious sak. Farah, Fadzlon and me talked about random stuff. From cable vision to POSSIBILITIES to hairs. Wah, I never knew Fadzlon thinks about posibilities. But all of his possibilities are nonsensical. He thinks way too out of the frame. But funny.

Then came recess, I literally feel like killing Fadzlon. Wah, damn annoying siak that boy. I was peacefully playing this game on Hafiz's psp and then when he came into the classroom, he immediately started to disturb me. And since then, he never stop disturbing me. So the nakal.

Today was such an awesome day. The non stop laughing with Farah, listening to fadzlon's nonsensical thoughts, disturbing people. Definately a day to remember. And i feel sad having to know that i only have a week to go with these crazy boobs. And i love them all. :)

.e.n.d.

Unappreciated

I'm better off DEAD.

My uncle Johnny did cocaine.

"Cuz I don't wanna be like this,
I've been running these streets for too long now,
I've got nothing, it's true, but this song now.
But the further I go, I wanna go home"
- The Dairy - Hollywood Undead

Farah: "Eh, The Killers nyer lastest album ape ar?"

Me: "Uncle Johnny."

Wah, this is the stupidest joke ever. Still we find it funny. Don't know why ley. But it's damn funny. Kan Madden?! I can instantly laugh whenever she reminded me of this incident. Actually right, i was so paisey that i got it wrong. The answer was actually Sam's Town. But the word Uncle Johnny came out of my mouth out of nowhere. And she took it as a joke. Actually quite funny ar.

Moving On...

I don't see a point of going to school these days. I came to school only because of my attendance. And i still think it's a waste of my time. But i still need help with my Chemistry. I need to start it all over again. I can't even remember and understand a single thing. But it seems like Mdm Zulaiha kept giving us worksheets. And believe me, trying to do something that you don't understand really sets my mood off. No matter how many times i try reading it over and over again. I still can't understand. I seriously need help with Chemistry! I need someone to teach me. I need someone who can really make me understand what the fuck is CHEMISTRY!

.e.n.d.

16 September 2008

Fuck, i cannot wait for this!
I seriously need my brother to pre-order it for me!
I CAN'T FUCKING WAIT FOR IT!


.e.n.d.

N levels

"I loved you, you made me, hate me. You gave me, hate, see?. It saved me and these tears are deadly. You feel that? I rip back, everytime you tried to steal that.You feel bad? you feel sad? Im sorry, hell no f**k that! It was my heart, it was my life, it was my start, it was your knife. This strife it dies, this life and these lies. And these lungs have sung this song for too long, and its true I hurt too, remember I loved you!"
- Black Dahlia - Hollywood Undead

Greetings! These few days have been quite depressing for me. The N levels are freaking killing me. I have no idea what i wrote for my malay composition. After reading it over and over again, i still have no idea what i was writing. Paper 2 was... i can't even say if it's easy or difficult. That's it for malay. I have no hope of getting a 4 for malay.I know i should aim higher. But i only got a 5 for my prelims. So, the chances of me getting a 2 or 1 is NEVER.



Yes. This is how i studied for my Social Studies. I don't have a huge whiteboard. So i turn the floor in my bedroom into a huge whiteboard. Yes, i do believe that we can remember things better by writing it down rather than trying to memorising it. Wah, semangat giler belaja Conflict in Sri Lanka and Northern Ireland. In the end, none of it came out on the SEQ section. And i did the SBQ badly. Again, no hope of passing Social Studies. English was alright. I used up the whole of 3hr 45mins finishing up both papers. I dare not sleep. Wah, i don't want to talk about my N levels. It only spoils my mood.

.e.n.d.
p.s i am loving HOLLYWOOD UNDEAD!

Whirlwind of events

" I'm not... broke I'm just a broken hearted man,
I know it makes no sense, but what else can I do,
How can I move on when I've been in love with you... "
- The Man Who Can't Be Moved - The Script

Whao, these past few days have been quite hectic and... tired? And as of this day, the N's is only 2 freaking days away. And the fasting month is only tomorrow. I have to admit, i am quite excited to fast but not so much about the N levels though. But first thing's first. I am here to blog about how the teacher's day went about.

The day was started off with a few prize giving. Actually not a few ah. A-L-O-T. I swear i had multiple leg cramps sitting on the oh-so-uncomfortable parade square floor. I have always hated morning assembly. Then we proceeded back to class after the long and draggy prize-giving presentation. Though, there was this particular guy who made the morning assembly a bit more lively with his first ever speech.

The first thing the others did was setting up for the party. While others was busy setting up at the fornt of the class, me and some other classmates were busy writing down our teacher's day message in this book at the back of the class. I feel quite bad not helping them but oh well, they were quite fast in setting up for the party. Especially the chinese girls. Good good.

Being not much of a junk food kinda person, my only aim was the cake. And the whole session was damn fun when everyone started taking photos. I, on the other hand, do not have much of the photos because most of the photos were from other people's camera. I don't enjoy taking photos that much. That explains the lack of pictures in my blog. :)

Ms Ong. I love this woman. I find her absolutely pretty on that day. Wah, now i feel bad crusing and talking bad behind her back. She can be cranky at times, and at certain times, i find her quite 'gerek'.
Ms Huda. Our co-form teacher. She's one of the most motivating teachers ever. She actually made me realise that malay is also as important as the other subjects. But no matter how hard i try, i seriously have no interest in malay. But i'm gonna try my best for the N levels. Mesti lah. N level oi! Tho, i find Naddy irritatingly adorable.

After all that photo taking session, the whole class settled down and we interacted with our two teachers. And it was such an emotional moment. Blah... After all the talking, we moved up to the hall. Wah, 4B was so the 'kecoh'. We were screaming and shouting while we were on the way to the hall.

The teacher's day concert was a total suckfest! I only enjoyed the first performance. The others was such a disappointment. And the one with the group of sec 3s, which did a song on teacher's day was a total crap. I mean, the melody wasn't even on the same page as the rhythm of the guitar. Pfft. Whatever. But i still think the whole concert was a suckfest.

Then on Saturday, i forcibly drag my ass to go study with my cousin at the airport. I seriously hate Terminal 3. I don't know why but i just hate it. It's just so freakishly HUMONGOUS. And yes, it was my first time there. And the first thing i told my cousin when we got off the bus was,"I hate this place!" But she made an effort of bringing me around the whole of Terminal 3. And until now i still hate it. Then we went to Terminal 2. To study.



At terminal 2 i was ok with it because i have been there before. But it was years and years ago. Then we decided to eat and Lisa treated me McDonalds. Wah, i have been craving for McDonalds for like a month or two. After a long chat and fulling up our stomachs, we decided to study. Then bla, bla, bla, when i was concentrating on Social Studies, these two 'good-looking' foreigner was sitting not too far from our table. And being the usual way as i am, i couldn't stop staring at them. I always have a "thing" towards the Americans. While my cousin on the other hand was all into the 'black people'. Yes, we are so unlike each other. Then Lisa started making jokes about shifting tables with the ones nearest with the two American dudes. And bla bla blah....


Ah, see that smile? That, my friend, is my supposititious smile. Like i said, i never liked taking photos. So case closed. And i swear Lisa was pissed off when i said no when she wanted to take another photo.

After getting distracted by the two american dudes, we decided to go off and take a walk around the whole airport. And I meant the whole of Teminal 1, 2 & 3. After walking, and walking, and walking, we decided to enter Candy Empire. Wah, that place is so the expensive. One bar of chcolate cost 3 bucks! And so i only brought 1 chocolate bar which cost me 3 bucks and a pathetic piece of sour candy which cost me like a buck. And i wasted 4 bucks just on candy. Tsk tsk tsk. Smart move, Sherry!

Then we continued walking and walking. And after a few funny and embarrassing incidents we decided to take the bus home. Wah, i was damned happy when i reached home. Eh, there's alot more that i wanted to post but i'm just too damn lazy. and besides it's already 12:46 in the morning. Wah, it took me like more than 3 hours just to type out this post. I wanna go to bed ley!

.e.n.d.

Hiatus

After having to sleep for merely 8 hours, i was awaken by the ringing of my phone. I thought the ringing would eventually stop when the person, on the other side, would get tried of waiting. But then i realise it wasn't a phone call. It was a message. I randomly pressed a button in order to stop the song from continuing. Barely opening up my eyes because of the sun casting its rays upon my room, i got a peek of the time. It was already 9.51am.

I got up and brushed my long and stringy hair with my fingers. And started to wonder who could it possibly be sending me a text message in the early morn. "1 new message" was display on my handphone screen. To my surprise, Miss Ong's name was highlighted in blue. It reads, "Bring both books so that you print at school the pages you all want". Still trying to figure out what she had wrote, I unintentional thought to myself the bad use of her grammar. Although it was an informal message between a teacher and a student, i was really having a tough time figuring out the message.

------------------------------------
Whao, that O level english composition book really have gotten into me. But all thanks to Miss Ong, my beloved form teacher, for lending me the book. And i was only kidding on the part,'bad use of her grammar'. For your info, she used to be an English teacher. It really made me want to write my essays like the way i did in the first two paragraph of this post. Nonetheless, i still think i must improve on it. The essays i have already read was way beyond my expectation. Thier essay was unbelievably good and out of this world. I only wish i could write like them.

Moving on.

Having only 10 points for my prelims, i have let myself down. I only wished i could do better. Naddy and Farah told me that passing the prelims meant that it was good enough and that i was ready for the n levels. Yet i thought to myself, what if i fail? What if i have to go to ITE? What if?! I literally cried in public, infornt of my cousin, in front of strangers when i thought about it. I was afraid. Afraid if i have failed myself. And most importantly afraid if i have to go to ITE. Not that i look down on those people.I don't have any grudge against that institution. But it's just isn't my kinda 'place'. That's what i thought to myself. But i'm gonna try my very best.

I think i'm gonna be on a hiatus. I think only.
Well, then. FAREWELL.

All i want is your love

All i want you to know is i love you and i do care for you.
And that i didn't mean to be rude to you.
But at times, you really don't seem to appreciate me.
Am i really that so insignificant?

It's Offical

It's offical.
She sits by my window every night while i'm asleep!

Avenged Sevenfold!

I can't fucking wait till 16 September. It is the first ever live Avenged Sevenfold Concert DVD from Long Beach Arena which also includes previously unreleased original and rare music from the recording session from Avenged Sevenfold Self-Tilted CD, cover songs of Iron Maiden and Pantera, and special remixes. How awesome is that?!

Moving on...

I never thought helping out at my mother's stall would be this hard. And sometimes it just gets me on my nerves. I hate it whenever a customer gets all arrogant. And whenever i had to send their food to their tables, some of them just have this fucking arrogant face and sometimes i fucking feel like shoving their food right in their fucking face. And whenever i start to curse them, my mother told me to be patient. The problem is, i can't be fucking patient. I fucking hate it when somebody gets me on my nerves. And tomorrow is another day of hell. Great!


.fuck.off.

National Day!

Wah, i never expect yesterday to be so enthusiastic and energetic. And i was trying to make it as meaningful as it can be 'cause i'll never know this could be the last year of my secondary school life. And i did. :)

Walauway! Laptop gone again! fuck! fuck! fuck!

.e.n.d.

Obsession

One of my other biggest influence.

And she's a goddess. :)


Amy LeeWhenever i listen to her singing, chills started running down my spine. She has
this soothing, haunting voice that never fail to captivate me. To me, she is the
most talented singer i've ever known. If you have been listening to their songs,
she really can pull off those really high notes. No one can ever replace Amy
Lee. :)

Eh, ever wondered which band i was so obsessed with before Avenged Sevenfold?


The RasmusWhoa, this picture is so old that i can't even remember which year it was. But yeah, i still have one of thier albums up on my bedroom wall. At that time, i was so obsess with...

Lauri YlonenThe frontman of The Rasmus. He was the one i was so crazy about last time. At that time, i thought he was hot. Just because he was good looking and had feathers on his hair. I was so kental, that i only liked him because he was good looking. But then...

Synyster GatesThis motherfucker stole my heart away with his solos. And I remembered the very first song that made me suddenly fell in love with Avenged Sevenfold. It was Lips Of Deciet from their very first album, Sounding The Seventh Trumpet. With Matt's screaming and awesome guitar riffs. By that time, i only knew Matt's name. But when their second album was released, the song Eternal Rest and I Won't See You Tonight, made me want to find out who was their lead guitarist. Since then, Brian was my role model. If it wasn't for him, i would have never played a guitar. Seriously. Last time, i have no interest in playing guitar. But i still suck at it. But Brian changed everything.(eee... i sound so kental. But whatever.)

Avenged Sevenfold♥!
.e.n.d.

Happy Birthday, Matt!

Dear Matt,

HAPPY BIRTHDAY!

ps. i find this picture quite funny.
you'll have to look properly if you wanna know what i mean.

Essays.

I never thought it would take me like 2 hours just to finish a piece of writing. It always depend on the topic or my mood. If the topic is an interesting one or something that i am interested in, it would never take me 2 hours to finish it. But writing a formal letter to some committee about a Community Involvement Programme is definately a boring topic. And i seriously have no mood to study today.

School today was... lazy? P.E was awesome. Malay was boring. And art? i spent the whole four periods talking and talking and more talking. Oh, and it was Nashrah birthday today and i only gave her a piece of tissuse. I wrote Happy Birthday and explain to her that it was a last minute thingy. I actually did it during our reading period in the morning assembly. It was mother tongue reading and i figured, why not i figure out something for nashrah's birthday present. And so, i only managed to find tissuse papers. And i figured, i could write something on it and then fold it into an envelop shape thingy. And luckily she find it cute and promise to frame it. Crazy girl. Well, i'm glad she liked it. Though, i still feel bad for not giving her something 'real'. Oh well, it's the thought that counts. :)

Now i wanna sleep.
.e.n.d.

Whoa, i spent like 2 hours yesterday just cleaning and rearranging stuff in my room. My room didn't look like a room before i cleaned it up. Because of art my room was in a mess. Eraser dust was all over the room. Colour pencils, scraps of papers were everywhere. Textbooks were scattered across the floor. My bed was not made. It's really uncomfortable sleeping with the bedsheets not properly done. I finally got to sweep and vacuum my room. The last time i checked, it was like a month ago. So, you get picture how my room was before i cleaned it up.

Ignore the winnie the pooh mattress. :D

Oh and the wireless connection is back working. Thanks to my brother for fixing even though it went loco like months and months ago. And he happens to let me use the laptop. Excited giler lah siak. But right now, he's away in KL and expecting to be back today. :)!

Now i want to study. Shoo!
.e.n.d.

Botaks

Wah, one botak's gone. Another one coming back!

YEAS!

Yes ar! I'm free! I AM FUCKING FREE FROM ART. Do you know how happy i was when Miss Ong check my prep work for the last time and she approved it?! I was damn happy untill i feel like running around the school naked! That part i know lame ar. But who cares?! Atleast i finally blogged.

Sial ar! Art was like hell ar. And i felt like crying just now thinking that we have to finish our prep work when school ends. But in end we were allow to stay back to finish it up. I hate it whenever Miss Ong is like this. Always want to make us so "kanciong"(don't care how it is spelled). I was so "kanciong" and i couldn't do my work properly. I swore i felt like breaking down. But that super annoying Hasyer was like,"Relax lah, relax lah". Sial ar! I swear i feel like smacking that boy's face! How can relax when you are so "kanciong" to finish it on time. But whatever it is, i manage to get it done on time. Wah! I'm so happy untill my english is like shit!

Anyway, i don't get people. Why do people betray people? Even the ones we trust. I don't fucking get it. And i'm fucking sick and tired about what is happening to the people around me.

Eh, Cute Is What We Aim For lastest album is not so bad ley. More 'rocking' then their previous one. Listen, listen! :)

.e.n.d.

Exanimate.

I seriously have no mood to blog anymore.

Feelings

I don't know which word should i be using to describe what i am feeling right now. It's this feeling when we got used to this 'thing'. But then this 'thing' went away. It feels different. It feels uncomfortable. But you have to force yourself to get use to it. It sucks being in this situation right now.

KentalJubo

Remember this?!

I finally got some time to surf the net and i ended up browsing through my older posts. And i am so embarrassed with myself. I was so pathetic and so obsessed and so lame and i have nowhere to hide my face.

I was so obsessed that on every post i have this pathetic countdown going on when Avenged Sevenfold was releasing their fourth album at that time. And i even made a layout for it. I can't believe that was me. Seriously.

.e.n.d.

Eh sial ar! I haven't even done my homework sak! And everytime i try to do it confirm got something distracting me. Cartoon lah, Movie lah, this lah that lah. And there's like only two more days until school reopens. Even going out with Naddy, Mira and Zi to do our homework was a disaster. After meeting each other, none of us would shut up. And we ended up not doing any of our homework.

We talk and talk and talk like there's no tomorrow. I haven't seen them for like a few weeks, and you know how exciting it is to see them again? Fucking excited sak until cannot stop talking. Now i have to finish them all by myself. Damn!

I know... DAMN HOT RIGHT?!

.e.n.d.

Tagged by : Farah Fatin

Rules!
- Post 10 random things about yourself
- Choose 5 people to tag and a reason you chose each person
- Leave them each a comment directing them to your blog so they know they are it
- You can’t tag the person who tagged you (you’ll have to make new friends)
- As a courtesy to the person who tagged you, please let them know when you have posted so they can have the sheer delight and extra work load of reading your answers

Here goes...

1. I hate surprises.
I usually find it hard to react to surprises. And it really freaks me out.

2. I can't swim.
Ok, this is embarassing but it's true. I can't really swim. Maybe it's because i never pick up any of those swimming lessons when i was little.

3. I panic.
This is so true. I tend to talk alot whenever i panic. And sometimes i tend to have difficulties in breathing.

4. I love funny people.
Who doesn't?

5. I like Farah Fatin. :)
I think she is the most random person i have sat with. She is fucking awesome to be with and totally crazy at times. Aku miss buat joke ngan kau! SPARKY SPARKY BOOM MAN!

6. I watch way too much cartoon.
Not a day pass by without cartoon in my life.

7. I can't say 'r'.
It's not that i can't. It just sounds funny. And everytime i say any word with 'r', it makes me feel like i have peanut butter stuck at the top of my mouth. And that makes it uncomfortable to say it.

8. I wish i had fairly odd parents.
So that i could wish Disney Channel would stop advertising on Hannah Montana and High School Musical because it always ruin my mood whenever i'm trying watch tv.
I understand that Disney Channel is trying to promote them. There should be a limit to it. But on every break? That's beyond the limit

9. I have really huge feet.
Yeah. My feet is really looong. I hate it.

10. I hate crowds.
This is why i don't have that many friends. I don't feel comfortable with many people around me. And i'm not good at socializing with people. Enough said.

Finally i'm done with that. I'm not sure about the "choose 5 people to tag". But do feel free to do it. Oh and let me know if you want to do it. So that i can pretend that i tagged you and you won't feel so paiseh and 'tak tahu malu'.

.e.n.d.

happy birthday, botak!

Happy 24th Birthday!

To the most gerek-est, merepek-est brother ever!